Bill and Grace Laing ... A Quiet Legacy

Speaking of legacies, I wanted to give a quick tribute to my dad's parents, my Grandpa and Grandma Laing, and to the legacy they've built. I'm going to try to make this short--I'm starting to believe that less really is more, in blogs and in life. In fact, I heard a quote recently that said something like "Forgive me, I didn't have time to write you a shorter note," point being that it's often more powerful and more meaningful not when you wax eloquent and long-winded, but when you choose your words carefully and put more thought into actually saying LESS (I think it was by Tennyson or Emerson; I'll try to find the exact quote and author and share them with you later....). Me? I'm still working on brevity myself.

My paternal grandfather, though, William ("Bill") Charles Laing and his bride of 68 years, my grandmother, Grace Scott Laing, are two of my idols and with very good reason. Their legacy is one to be proud of, and they are. They raised 7 children (1 daughter and 6 boys; Grandpa Bill used to always say they had "one-and-a-half-dozen kids"), they have about 40 grandchildren or so and I lose track of how many great-grandchildren (several dozen). I mean, my parents only had 3 kids but they have 17 grandchildren between us, if you can imagine (my sister has 8 of her own)! With six more aunts and uncles and lots of married cousins, well ... you can probably do the math.

Grandpa has cancer now--he's riddled with tumors and Grandma can barely remember her name; she definitely does not remember yours when you go visit. It's actually kind of endearing at times (she's a lot sweeter these days). I went and visited them a couple weeks ago and she kept asking for pictures with names on them and telling us how they used to call her "Great Scott!" whenever they saw her back in school many years ago.

I mention them on this blog, and tell you they're my idols, because they have lived a life FULL of service and caring and unconditional love. When I was a senior in high school I remember many a basketball or soccer game where they were the only ones there cheering me on (my parents didn't even make it, usually). My granddad, especially, has been a pillar of honor, truth and service all his life.

Trust me, Grandma was not the easiest mother, wife or matriarch to grow up with, I'll freely admit. Passionate about her family, the gospel, and her nutrition and lingerie business (she sold "intimates" out of her home for a company, I forget the name), she was also pretty batty at times, pretty cranky at others and just not very healthy; she had blackouts about every 60 days or so, which were trying I know. But Grandpa Bill looked after her and looked AT her, and has for almost seven decades now, as the beautiful, perfect young woman he married. I've never once heard him complain, never once seen him lose his temper, never once even seen him roll his eyes over her frequent rants and ravings. No, he would just put his arms around her, compliment her cooking, help her up to bed and tuck her in for the night. He is and has been, for as long as I can remember, a SAINT--the most loving, faithful, and consistent person I have ever had the privilege of knowing.

He is the original "Deep River" and my inspiration to become that man. You would agree, if you knew him ... the epitome of Triumph. I personally believe that this is one of those key principles behind an inarguably Triumphant life: if you can't truly learn to serve ... if you can't truly be consistent ... if you tend to throw in the towel too easily, when things get tough or people aren't perfect around you ... if you can't overcome the hard things in life, even when they are closest to you? If you can't do these things, you can never expect to Triumph over life. And, not just this, but you will also never truly find the joy and satisfaction available to us all. Joy comes through endurance and patience and turning the other cheek, in my experience. It comes through loving those around us unconditionally (except in rare cases of abuse or neglect, of course; then we may love them but we may also exit for our sanity and safety and this is perfectly understood, and personal, of course).

I've watched my grandparents and I've see "Triumph" in their eyes. They have never been rich as to the things of this world, the material "needs" we all think we "need." But they are WEALTHY and they have been ... their entire lives. They may not have much, they may be running out of time--Grandpa is 96 and dying of cancer; Grandma is 90 and I can't imagine her hanging on long without him present in her life--but, they have lived their lives the way any of us would be proud to--FULLY. They have sucked the marrow out of life and built a legacy of which they can be proud. I know I am. I don't know anyone who knows them who isn't.

I appreciate you very much, you two. Don't know if you'll ever get on and read this post; probably not. But, that's okay. It's the thought that counts ... and I think you're both amazing.

Ever grateful,

Your eldest grandchild, John Patrick "River" Laing